November 09, 2006

Thank God for Gyms

Thank God for Gyms. Gyms are where you see people slimmer than you and feel inspired. It is also there that you see people fatter than you and feel blessed.

Here are some typical gymmers:
Her Majesty- Probably an ex-athlete/university/ state level player, she wears a severe expression and walks imposingly as if she owns the place. Usually in no nonsense tracks & a T-shirt with some number on it & biceps to match. Could begin Gymmers Anonymous (GA)- given their addiction to gymming. In the absence of the trainer she becomes gym monitor. Give way to her, if she comes to the equipment you are using.

Roo - She burns calories hopping. Very fickle and sprightly, she hops from one exercise to the other in just a matter of seconds For variety, she is the self nominated radio channel/ cassette/ CD changer.

Wet Blanket- She is the perpetual complainer- the workperson who blames the tools... gym equipment . No gym is hi tech enough to the one she went to ( or claims she did ) back in the USA/ Europe/etc. She is also the least likely to have lost weight.

Ms Brando- Life is about fashion and attitude. This Diva wears only "Firnag" brands- be it shoes, clothes or even her make up .Yes she comes made up for a work out! "Tracks from export reject shops are just not ok you know." she says to us mere mortals in Fashion Street clothes.

Babe watcher- Not sure about how this translates in a men's gym but in a ladies' gym there are women who observe other women and offer unsolicited comments and complements on various parts of your anatomy.

Stink Bomb- Stinky shoes, stinky hair, stinky underarm... need I say more. Need to find out her bday and gift her a deo.

Zombie- Straight out of bed to gym, possibly in her night clothes, hair unkempt, tries to catch up on sleep by choosing the least rigorous exercise in the most inconspicuous corner of the room. Differs from stink bomb since she is not a social liability.

Talkathon- This is one enthu cookie. The enthusiasm is focussed on yakking away with all the various kinds of gymmers. Some indulge her and some find her distracting and some plain ignore her.

The Panter- No typo there. She pants and huffs because she wants to maximise her time here. Pity over enthusiasm is not contagious.

Petrified gymmer- The sweet simple type who desperately wants to fit in but is in awe of both the coaches and the co gymmers

Motivated gymmers- New mom. about to be bride, seven year itch, newly diagnosed with some ailment that required weight loss- these are the various sub types. While they are sincere, they wish to see magical results in record time. They check their weight daily and live in hope.

Gate Crashers- The model types who prance around the gym in their hot bodies without any jiggle-jangle of flab. They make you wonder why they are there and then provoke you silently into doing more exercise. Me thinks they are planted by the gym trainers/ owners.

Watch Dog- The conscience keeper- the tracker or squealer- she masquerades as a trainee but is in fact the trainer's spy. she knows all. Better befriend her. Natural enemies with the Gymthusiast.

Ladies Club- Rather chirpy and loud, they exchange notes on maids, cooking, shopping, beauty tips, job openings, gossip and sometimes if they remmeber weight loss/ gain as well. They are happy to congregate at an appointe dtime and make merry

Bumper- This one bumps into equipment, trainers, trainee and herself. Invariably she is on every machine that decides to bum out that day.

Trainers- They are only one kind - cruel. ( well that maybe an over generalization)

Writers/ Blogger- Yes, you find them at the gym as well looking for unsuspecting subject matter for their blog.

GYMS stand for Gundu girls Yellarum Made Slim.
I cannot put that in English since I cannot find a suitable expansion.




18 comments:

Noodlehead said...

hahaha...good one! i really miss my gym :( not to mention all the hunks there! how come the hunk-watcher has no place on your list?

artnavy said...

it is a ladies gym

Anonymous said...

Hahaha..
So, do you go to gym?

Rio said...

LOL! good one indeed! liked the way it was written on the various types of gymgoers. which are the good gyms in chennai?

Nee said...

:-)
And which category do you belong to, aside from the last??

Nee

Rohini said...

How about this category:
Would be gymmers who pay up for a year and attend for all of 15 days out of 365!

my life.... said...

haha... nalla seripulla post:)

Orchid said...

Good one...what about the on and off(er's), back to the gym every 3 months or so and out in a month or so....You know why I am so familiar with this category now, don't you ;)

passerby55 said...

Hello,

Writers/ Blogger- Yes, you find them at the gym as well looking for unsuspecting subject matter for their blog ...

written well,after studying every specimen in the lab. ...

I like such post. when they are carefully well researched and then written...

gundu girls yellarum made slim..now what does that mean?

Enjoyed this post.

thankyou

geetha said...

So, do you go to the gym? ;)

Keshi said...

lol @GYMS!

Keshi.

Anonymous said...

lol!!! nice observation and funny post :)

artnavy said...

passer by says-
"Fat girls all made slim"

itchingtowrite said...

ha ha good one. i hate the ones that r found on every equipment u wish to exercise on and teh stink bombs

Inder said...

nice one :)
we have a gym in our madras office. if you want to find who in the office are about to be married soon, you shall have a look at the list of gym visitors :P

artnavy said...

i have multiple personality disorder when it comes to gymming
Monday- Wednesday- motivated gymmer
Thursday- Roo
Friday- Zombie
Saturday- Invisible usually

Sat said...

Funny one!
loved the expanded version of GYM :D
The most distracting characters if you ask me are the oens outside the gym; the one i go to is directly beneath the food court and thanks to that you got a lot of poeple chomping down chats and staring at you while you sweat it out at the gym. Now that is cruel :(

Anonymous said...

Funny list. Very good desciptions.